How to Heal a Broken Heart and Relationships That Are Over

I was speaking with a dear friend and client recently and she shared how she was having a really rough time moving beyond a romantic relationship that was now over. That’s something we all tend to face at one time or another in our life.

So, I decided to share some ideas with you … in case you are also struggling with moving on and want to learn ways to heal a broken heart.

I’ve always been an observer of people, situations, and trying to find ways to improve things when they aren’t working. It’s something I was doing long before my industrial engineering training about how to look for the root cause of something and then “fix” it.

When it comes to relationships, I noticed something from my own life.

What Happens When You End a Relationship?

Particularly in romantic relationships, if I was the one that declared it was over, then it really was over for me.

I don’t take relationships lightly. So if I declare I love someone, that means I’ve gone “all in” – body, mind, and soul. Ending it isn’t something I take lightly either. I often agonize over the decision, weigh the pros and cons, and feel sad about how much emotional pain the other person could experience when I tell them we are done. And, of course, I make sure I do it kindly from a place of love and caring for the other person.

If I’ve made the decision to end it, it really is over for me. It feels complete.

Sometimes when the honeymoon period is over (science says that is typically 6 months to 3 years) and the endorphins are no longer sending those glorious “falling in love” chemicals, it’s so much easier to see the truth of the other person and the relationship that you have.

Sometimes those honeymoon chemicals stop firing because enough negative things have happened that chip away at the fantasy you’ve created in your mind about who the person is and how they treat you.

I have a little video about the Honeymoon Principle on YouTube. If you check it out, please give it a like and subscribe to my channel!

For me, those endings can be quite abrupt. I suddenly see with great clarity where the relationship is headed, how my self esteem has been affected, and if this person is truly kind, caring, and giving, or completely selfish and demanding about having their way.

What Happens When the Other Person Ends the Relationship?

When the other person ends the relationship, well, that’s an entirely different story.

For me, it’s typically not something I saw coming. Even though I have many intuitive gifts, premonitions rarely happen for me. And, as is true for so many people, when you are emotionally or energetically involved, it’s much harder to see clearly.

That’s why for many healers and intuitives, it’s so easy to see what’s going on with other people and what can help them the most, but hard to see the best course of action for themselves. That’s because there’s energetic and emotional entanglement going on, and often a good dose of Karmic caca. LOL.

When someone else ended a relationship, we feel a huge sense of loss and lack of completion. It feels as if our heart is broken. And that’s what my friend was facing.

She needed a way to heal from a broken heart.

Of course, the heart isn’t actually broken. But the emotional wounding is so intense, it’s how we describe the sensation.

From a conscious language perspective, we truly should never state it that way since the subconscious mind is literal and always listening.

What are some things you can do to heal a broken heart and move on?

The first thing I suggest is to disentangle energetically from the other person. Gently dissolve energetic cords (I prefer that to cutting them – it’s more gentle). Often, intimate partners cord at the base and sacred chakras, as well as the heart. If there is a power struggle between the two people, they often cord at the solar plexus (the power center). The longer the duration of the relationship, the more cords there tend to be … unless you routinely eliminate them.

Another way to heal a broken heart is to get rid of absolutely everything that contains the energetic signature of the person and/or the relationship. Every gift they ever gave you, things you purchased together, and shared. Definitely your bed if you lived together or were married.

Yes, these seem like radical actions, but when you remove these items from your home, it frees up the energy. Your home begins to feel more like you again. Rather than a giant container for memories of what is now gone.

Even though certain items are things you love, subconsciously they are a constant reminder of the past, what is now lost, gone, no longer part of your experience. Those subconscious memories are sad and depressing to the inner child.

Something highly therapeutic any time we experience emotional pain is to do something artistic. The art doesn’t have to be good. It’s much more about the enjoyment of creating something. And, playing with color is often very uplifting.

If you’d like to try adult coloring as a form of art therapy, come to one of my Transformational Coloring classes. You can find out the schedule of those classes from my newsletter. Sign up for the free meditation gifts on this page and you will automatically be added to the email list.